


By Order of Your Captain

by xmjcx



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-29
Updated: 2018-06-02
Packaged: 2019-05-15 18:18:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14795529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xmjcx/pseuds/xmjcx
Summary: When the world began to fall apart and the dead began to walk, Beth Greene couldn't imagine anything worse than becoming infected.That is, until her older brother loses a bet to Merle Dixon, and changes her life forever.





	1. the sound of the sea

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome aboard.

The sound of the sea makes her feel nauseous.

The taste of it on her tongue doesn’t help to squash the sickly feeling that is sloshing around in her belly, either. As she thinks more about it, she realises that salt was never something that she had been particularly fond of before, not something that she poured onto her food in the way that her friends did; and like some sort of joke – a cruel twist of fate, really – it’s something that she is exposed to through scent and through taste each and every day now.

For the foreseeable future, at least. If not longer.

A lot has changed in a short period of time. Not just in Beth’s life, but in the world in general. Still, she doesn’t allow herself to dwell on that for too much longer. For a start, she wouldn’t even begin to make sense of half of the things that are going on out there – all that she really understands is what was said on the news before the television channels stopped broadcasting; and even then, a lot of what was said was purely down to speculation rather than anything else.

She isn’t interested in asking questions that nobody knows the answer to. Not anymore.

It’s too exhausting.

Fresh air is something that no longer means the same to her as it did in the world before. Alright, so the air out here is clean, unpolluted – she can’t argue with that. But the air out here is absolutely not the same air that she was used to when she lived back home, on the farm. And she considered that air to be fresh and clean and unpolluted, too, and the distinct difference is one that she notes, and one that she isn’t fond of. This air is salty rather than sweet, and it hits her lungs in a way that is bitter rather than pleasing. She doesn’t enjoy the crispness of it, nor does she enjoy the way that it tempts her to think about happier memories of family vacations to the beach when she was younger.

In a matter of days, everything in her life has changed in ways that she never could have imagined; in ways that she never could have wanted, either.

Right now, it's very debatable as to whether she would rather be here - forced on a ship against her will, to be with a man that she had never met before, like some old-fashioned fairy tale gone wrong - or be one of the dead that roams the earth, unable to feel anything but blood-thirsty hunger. Unlike the books that she read as a child, there's no handsome prince to save her; not from this situation or from this world, and part of her doesn't even think that she would want there to be. Her feelings towards men in general have taken a downward turn since her brother lost his bet - a bet of all damned things - to Merle Dixon and got her into this mess in the first place.

On the plus side, she thinks, it’s starting to get a little bit easier to resist the urge to cry.

It isn’t as though Beth necessarily wants to spend all of her time moping around, but she doesn’t want to play happy families, either.

Not with _him_.

As her thoughts run wild, Beth leans her upper body over the metal railing that lines the top deck of the ship so that she can see the cold water beneath the ship, the rail preventing her from falling into it. She watches the waves as they lazily lick up the steel of the boat, as if they are reaching out to her; singing out her name, tempting her in. She always had enjoyed swimming - been good at it, too - but she knows that the waters beneath this ship are cold and dark and unforgiving.

Beth knows that the sight of the dancing ocean is something that she probably would have enjoyed before – hell, she would’ve probably considered it to be beautiful, to be artistic and meaningful; a metaphor of some sort that absolutely would have struck a chord inside of her.

Now, the sight does nothing. She feels completely indifferent towards it.

Her life has changed in so many ways in so few days, and Beth is so resentful for that.

“You okay, princess?”

For the first time in the eighty-six hour period that she has known him, Beth doesn’t roll her eyes at the nickname. She does, however, scoff.

“Yeah,” she huffs, resting her chin against the palm of her hand as she continues to stare at the water below, refusing to make eye contact with him. Beth knows that he is watching her, and she tries her hardest to maintain a straight, stoic face, not wanting to give anything away. After a few beats of silence – not necessarily a comfortable one, but the atmosphere around them isn’t tense, either, so she’s not complaining – Beth relaxes her shoulders ever so slights and breathes out a sigh. “I just – I miss it,” she says, the words slipping from her tongue before she can stop them. The blonde knows that he will know what she’s suggesting, but she continues anyway. “Home.”

She has no idea why she tells him this. This man who she barely knows, this man whom she has been promised to - she has no interest in sparking up a relationship with him, and at the same time she is engaging in a conversation with him. It's as insane as it is confusing, and her head hurts from the frustration swirling inside of her.

The thing is, Beth doesn't hate him - not really. But she wants to hate him; she wants to hate him an awful lot.

“This is your home now,” he says, his voice even and calm, and yet it has the gruffness to it that she is beginning to grow accustomed to. He doesn't sound as though he's surprised that she's spoken to him, and that frustrates her too.

“So you’ve said,” Beth mutters, but she knows that he can hear her even over the roar of the waves below.

“An’ I mean it,” he responds, his tone still the same, refusing to show her any signs of emotion. The thing is, she shouldn’t be annoyed at the way in which he masks his feelings so well, for she tries to hide her feelings from him in a very similar way; but she is frustrated, because she knows that hiding isn’t something that she’s good at, whereas this infuriating man is almost impossible to read. “Ain’t jus’ sayin’ it for the fun of it, girl.”

It’s getting much more difficult for her to continue fighting the natural instinct to roll her eyes at him, and the blonde knows that she will succumb to it sooner rather than later.

A few more beats of silence pass between them before he speaks again, and Beth is somewhat surprised – she thinks this is the most that she has heard him speak since she first met him. The hours that have passed since their initial encounter have been somewhat tense and awkward, and if she didn't know any better - or perhaps if she knew him any better - then she would have guessed that he was avoiding her.

“You should get back to the cabin. ‘s gettin’ late, it’ll be dark out here soon.”

Instinctively, Beth scoffs once more. “Is that a suggestion, or an order, captain?” she responds, turning her head sharply so that she is now facing him, and she can tell from the way that his crystal eyes practically blaze at her that she has hit a nerve with her sour tone.

“Beth,” he says, his voice low; almost as if he is growling at her. She may not know this man very well whatsoever, but it’s clear to her that this is his way of warning her, and the blonde truthfully has no desire to really piss him off. So, admitting defeat, she tucks a few loose strands of hair behind her ear and turns on her heel as quickly as she can, not wasting another moment for him to belittle her more than he already has done already.

In a matter of days, everything in her life has changed in ways that she never could have imagined; in ways that she never could have wanted, either.

If she had it her way, she wouldn't have to endure another minute on this damned ship.


	2. the beginning of the end

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We take a look at what happened before, and what is happening now.

When the beginning of the end happened, it was her father, Hershel, who broke the news to her.

Coming from a small town – Senoia – in Georgia, Beth had never really been exposed to overwhelming large groups of people, apart from the very few times when she ventured to Atlanta with her older sister, Maggie. She had never been all that into watching television, either. She may have been seventeen years old in a very fast-paced world, but life on the farm was different. It was sheltered in a way that Maggie had always hated but Beth had always been fond of. It was almost as if their lives were untouched by the things that went on outside of the borders of their land, and Beth couldn’t help but love the serenity and peacefulness that came along with that.

Her daddy had always said that Beth had an old soul, and she would more than happily admit that she spent most of her free time reading or writing rather than sitting in front of a TV screen. So when the world went to shit – when the dead began walking and the virus that apparently caused it appeared to spread like wildfire – she was, initially, completely oblivious.

Looking back, she wishes that it had stayed that way.

She really, really does.

But, it didn’t. It was probably around one week after it became common knowledge that the dead were roaming the streets that her mother, Annette, began to show symptoms of her own. At first, the Greene’s ignored it – none of them wanted to accept what was happening inside of their own home. The town itself didn’t even seem that disturbed by the virus. People were still functioning, at least; shops were still open, and so was the school, although Beth didn’t attend classes anymore. When it became clear that her mother was well and truly sick and most likely wasn’t going to get better any time soon, Hershel sat her down and explained to her – as best he could, at least – what was happening to her mother.

The thing was, Beth probably knew just as much, if not more, than he did. She had overheard Maggie talking to her friends over the phone about everything that was happening – not just in their town, and not even just in their state, but across the country; across the world. And whilst Beth had been distraught to know that her mother had been consumed by the virus, she already knew in her heart that her daddy would never lay a finger upon her mother – not even if she wasn’t there anymore, even if she was just a shell of her former self.

He loved her too much to cause her any harm, even if she was no longer there.

When it came to making a decision, Hershel chose to involve the whole family – not just Beth and her older siblings, Maggie and Shawn, but those who helped out on the farm, too; Patricia and Otis. In the end, they chose to keep Annette in the barn – Hershel felt that she would be safe there, undisturbed until the government released a cure for the virus.

Looking back, it was a stupid idea. Beth should have guessed that nothing would ever be released to stop the spread of the effects of the virus. Instead, she allowed herself to believe that her mother wouldn’t be sick forever – that there was a chance she would be safe.

That there was a chance she would come back.

Despite herself, Beth wonders if she’s still there.

.

.

.

“Y’know, life prob’ly wouldn’t be so bad for you here if you weren’t so pissin’ _up yourself_ , blondie.”

The sound of Merle’s voice coming from the doorway of the chamber where she had been sleeping for the last three nights caused the blonde to really have to fight her instinct to shudder, and Beth’s mouth fell into a frown as she looked up in his direction from where she was perched on the end of the bed, pausing in the motion of untying the laces of her battered old black converse.

The sight of a smug grin on his arrogant face was not one that she had hoped to see this morning, and she highly doubted that he was here for no reason whatsoever. She could only imagine why he had been sent for her - _who knows,_ she thought, _maybe today's the day that they make you walk the plank._

Having grown up being the youngest of three children, Beth had always been pretty good at standing her ground and giving quick comebacks to sarcastic, teasing words; but the hour was still early, and she still wasn't quite well-adjusted to the feel of the sea beneath them. So for once, the blonde felt as though she didn't really know what to say back in response to the older man's quip. So instead of saying anything quick or witty, Beth sighed. “Oh, really?” she breathed out, her tone dry, no amusement or playfulness in it.

After spending near enough two and a half days travelling with him from her home on the farm to reach the ship, Beth had absolutely no interest in spending another minute more in Merle Dixon's company. That stretch of time had been more than enough for her. The man was vulgar and unpleasant; not just wanting to tease her constantly for fun, but actively wanting to make her feel uneasy and uncomfortable whenever he possibly could. The thought of being left alone with him anywhere on this ship caused Beth to feel anxious, and for what might have been the first time ever, Beth was actually glad that it was his younger brother, Daryl, who she had been committed to instead of him.

Daryl might have appeared to be nothing but trouble for her in his own right, but she considered herself to be a good judge of character, and the younger of the two Dixon's didn't make her feel uncomfortable. Annoyed, sure; awkward, yes; uncertain, absolutely - but never anxious, never uneasy, never out of her depth or hell, _scared_.

Then again, she was yet to spend any real quality time with him. She supposed that first impressions could easily be deceiving. 

Apparently not taking the hint that his presence was anything but welcome in her room, Merle leaned his shoulder against the doorway, making it clear to Beth that he wasn’t planning on leaving her alone anytime soon. She felt that he was actively trying to intimidate her at every opportunity - standing in the doorway, blocking her exit so that she had no choice but to face him and interact with him. Geez - he really _did_ give her the creeps. “Yep,” he said, his lips smacking loudly for emphasis.

“Well,” Beth said as she returned her attention to her sneakers, keeping her responses to his words short and sweet in the hopes that it would cause him to have little interest in her and then he might actually choose to leave her alone for a little while longer. She could really do with some peace and quiet, especially after she had a pretty rough night's sleep. “I’ll keep that in mind. Thanks, Merle.”

Her tone was blunt and disengaging, and Beth knew that despite his act, Merle wasn’t half as stupid as he seemed. She knew that he was up to something – there wouldn’t be any other reason for his presence if he didn't have a reason to be here. The older man might take great pleasure in watching her squirm around him, and he might thoroughly enjoy teasing her, but she had noticed that he did that to pretty much everyone that he interacted with, so there was no real reason that he would have sought her out if he didn't have a reason. The two hadn't even spoken all that much on their travel to the ship - after all, it hadn't been as though Beth had been in any sort of mood to keep up any small-talk since she had been taken from her family home against her will by the man, and she hadn't been best pleased with the way in which the turn of events had come to be - and so quickly - either. 

Still, that’s something that she knew Merle didn’t hold himself personally responsible for. _"Jus' followin' orders",_ he had told her, although he wouldn't give her much insight into his younger brother, whom he was taking her to. _"Your brother owes me a debt, since he lost on our little bet. He promised me a hot young piece for my brother if he lost, an' you know the sayin', sweet cheeks. You win some, you lose some."_

Of course, whether she liked it or not, Beth couldn't fight or deny the fact that it all came back to Shawn and his gambling addiction.

The bald-headed man snickered at her response and continued to watch her from where he leaned lazily against the door frame. Once she was finished tying her laces, Beth pushed herself upright so that she was looking right at him from across the room.

Slumping her shoulders – not quite in defeat, but at the same time, she knew that she was going to have to say something since he clearly wasn’t for getting this conversation over and done with – Beth cocked a brow in his direction. “What is it that you want, Merle?” she asked, exasperation evident in her tone.

The annoyance must have been audible in her voice, too, and Merle smiled in her direction. Beth inwardly groaned – she could only assume that he was taking great pleasure from the fact that she evidently was reacting to the ways in which he was pushing her buttons. That was his fix, almost; his golden moment: all that he ever seemed to want was a reaction from her, and she couldn't help herself but to give him one, despite the fact that she constantly tried her hardest to act blasé and disinterested.

He let out a low chuckle as he pushed off the doorway so that he too was standing upright, towering above her even from the distance. “S’nothin’ major,” he said, the wicked grin on his mouth telling her otherwise. "Least it ain't nothin' tha' you don't already know, I'm sure." After a few beats of silence, when he realised that Beth wasn't in the mood to continue entertaining him by retaliating constantly to his comments, Merle spoke again; his eyes – so similar to his younger brother’s – meeting with hers from across the room. “Jus’ thought I’d give you the heads up ‘bout this room.”

Frowning, Beth was taken off guard by his words. “This room?” she repeated, confusion more than evident in her voice. What on earth was he talking about? 

The feel of her mouth turning downwards frustrated her to no end. She _really_ needed to practice this whole guarding-her-feelings thing if she was ever going to get any better at it - everyone else on board this ship seemed as though they could manage it well enough, so Beth wasn't sure why it was taking her so long to be able to do anything about it. She didn't want to keep giving everything away; not to people who she didn't know, people who she didn't trust.

“Yep,” he said, smacking his lips once more. “See - an' I'm sure tha' you'll remember, blondie - this room? It ain’t yours.”

Rolling her eyes, Beth folded her arms across her chest and glared impatiently at the older man. Now he really was just trying to tease her for no reason other than to be argumentative. A part of her worried over whether this might be some sort of turn on for him. “You’re wrong, Merle,” she said, and despite the annoyance that she felt towards him, her tone sounded almost chirpy; like a song. She supposed that it was just because of her confidence, she knew that she was right and he was wrong, even if he didn't look as though he thought that. “Ask Carol. She told me herself - this is _my_ room.”

Merle continued to grin at her in a way that reminded her of the Cheshire cat from Alice in Wonderland, and again she found herself repressing the urge to shudder violently. He really, really gave her the creeps. “The fuck would I ask her for?” he scoffed, amusement evident in his smile, in his tone, in his stance. It didn't take a genius to work out the fact that he was mocking her, and Beth felt herself stand up taller at the acknowledgement. “She ain’t the captain o’ this ship, is she?” he continued.

“Last I heard, neither were you,” Beth retorted, her arms still crossed tightly in defiance over her chest.

Her response caused Merle to howl out into the room with his shrill, high-pitched laughter, and despite herself, the blonde felt her cheeks beginning to tinge with a pink colour. He was like a cackling hyena, shaking his head at her. However, the toothy smile fell quickly from his face when he opened his mouth to speak once more. 

“You’re right there, blondie,” he said, nodding his head slowly as he stared straight at her in a way that caused her to feel all sorts of uneasy once more. “An’ I’m right, too. This. Room. Ain’t. Yours. So you’re gonna need to git, pronto.”

The frown on the older man’s face began to droop lower and lower with each word that passed his lips, and there was no hint of amusement or entertainment in his tone when he spoke anymore. More than anything, it was clear to Beth that his patience with her was wearing thin – and if there was one thing that the blonde had learned about Merle Dixon in their short time together as travel companions, it was that the man was anything but patient.

“Where?” she asked, the exasperation in her voice clear as she threw her arms up by her sides, signalling out into the air. “Where is it that you're suggesting I go to instead, Merle?”

“Your new home,” the older man responded, the amusement creeping up into his voice again as he flashed her a toothy grin. “The Captain’s quarters.”


	3. the bedroom floor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth explores her new living space.

When Beth had initially boarded the ship, she had not been prepared for a lot of things.

Although she had a rough idea of what was going to happen – that she was going to be stuck aboard the ship – she hadn’t been all that prepared to be handed over to the captain – Daryl – by his older brother like a piece of meat. Merle hadn’t given her much warning of what was going to go on once they arrived on deck, and she had felt so _small_ as he nudged her towards his brother.

“There he is, sweet cheeks,” Merle had grinned, one of his large hands on her shoulder, edging her closer towards the captain. “My baby brother. Your new man.”

Flabbergasted, Beth’s eyes had widened dramatically. “My what?” she hissed, not wanting to draw much attention to herself – although she could already feel eyes burning into her from all directions – but at the same time, not caring who saw or who heard.

Chuckling, Merle nodded his head towards his brother. “Y’heard me,” he said, a wide grin plastered across his mouth.

Despite the fact that it was obvious to Beth that Daryl would have known what was going on – after all, he didn’t act or look surprised to see her – he still appeared to be completely disinterested in her presence, and she hadn’t been prepared for that, either.

Although, what had she expected? Beth supposed she didn’t know. The only thing that Beth could compare this to was books that she had read – fairy tales with happy endings – and none of the men in those books behaved in the way that Daryl did. They were kind and welcoming and sweet and endearing –

\- and he just looked at her blankly.

Another thing that Beth hadn’t been prepared for was the actual size of the ship. It was humongous, and nothing like she had imagined it to be when she had travelled to the coast with Merle. In her mind, she had been anticipating an old-fashioned wooden pirate ship; but this was nothing of the sort, of course.

She had to keep reminding herself that this wasn’t some make-believe story that she had read as a child. This was real.

This was her life, now.

The ship was massive and modern and new, and it looked strong and sturdy, too. Made of steel and what she supposed was a very typical silver colour – the bottom of it a deep shade of navy – it held an awful lot of people; although Beth hadn’t been prepared to see just how many men and women worked on board for the captain, either.

Fair enough, it wasn’t exactly your fancy cruise ship that was jam-packed with hundreds of workers dressed in clean, crisp uniforms. But there was certainly a larger amount of people on board than she had originally anticipated there would be, and from what little Merle, Daryl and Carol had told her – separately, of course – Beth had gathered that she was the only person on board who didn’t actually want to be here.

Apparently, she was the only person on board who didn’t have a job, or a purpose, too.

Naturally, the blonde hadn’t recognised any of the staff on board – although she was sure that she hadn’t seen all of them yet. In all honesty, that was something that she _had_ expected. Beth hadn’t been holding out any hope to see a friendly face – after all, she had never in all of her seventeen years heard of anyone who had gone away to work on a ship, so it was no surprise to her that everyone here was a stranger.

Regardless, Beth thought that it might end up to be a blessing that there was nobody that she knew from before aboard this ship. After all, she was humiliated enough being in this position as it was – she didn’t need anyone’s sympathy to make her feel even worse.

After all, she just knew that none of the crew aboard Daryl’s ship sympathised with her.

They all adored their captain.

Another thing that Beth had not been prepared for – and perhaps the one that was most relevant to her in this moment – was just how _cold_ it would be aboard the ship. After all, it _was_ almost September; but even so, summer was still very much here, and yet for the last four days, she had seen very little sunlight above them. It was mostly cloudy with the occasional bout of rain, and although Beth had been used to the cold – after all, she’d experienced sixteen winter’s in Georgia – the blonde hadn’t thought that much about what clothing she was going to bring aboard the ship, and so had only grabbed a handful of items.

Unfortunately, none of the items of clothing that she had brought with her did a brilliant job of keeping her warm.

And here she was; stood in the centre of the captain’s quarters, feeling all sorts of awkward.

The room itself was stunning. Towards the left hand side of it was a stand-alone porcelain bathtub that was easily large enough for four people, never mind one, although it didn’t look as though it had been used recently. It looked almost out of place in the room due to its colour – everything else was dark, and not necessarily gloomy, but certainly reminded her of _men_ , whereas the tub was so clean and bright.

It didn’t belong here.

Just like she didn’t.

Not too far behind the tub was a door, which she assumed led her towards the bathroom. The flooring beneath her bare feet was cold; huge, dark tiles that looked to be worth more than anything that had decorated her family home.

In the centre of the room was a four-poster bed, not necessarily mahogany, but more of a dark chocolate. The curtains around it were cream – surprisingly – and the sheets a similar colour. It was the largest bed that Beth had ever laid eyes upon – easily the size of two kings pushed together, if not larger - and the blonde wasn’t convinced that there was a name for this size of it.

At the foot of the bed was a large rug, and the sight of it tempted Beth closer despite herself. It was so soft and warm beneath her feet, and – like most other things in this room, if not on this whole ship – Beth wondered just how much it had cost.

Material things had never interested her much. Life on a farm did that to a person, she supposed – after all, her whole family was the same. There was no use for expensive items of clothing or jewellery when they all did such a hands-on job. The most expensive thing that Beth owned was a Michael Kors watch that was gifted to her by her parents on her sixteenth birthday, and that was nowhere to be found, now.

Towards the right hand side of the room was a desk that was a similar colour to the bed, and across it were piles and piles of paper and folders. As she stared over at it for a while, she supposed that it wasn’t necessarily messy; realistically, it was more like organised mess, which she assumed came as a result of Daryl being the captain of such a large ship.

The sound of the door to the room creaking slightly as it opened from behind her caused Beth to jump, and instinctively reach out and grasp at the bedpost with one of her hands. No longer lost in her thoughts and exploration of the unfamiliar space, Beth whipped her neck round to see who it was that had entered the captain’s quarters.

Considering the fact that it was his quarters – and the fact that she hadn’t seen him at all today, despite being sent here by Merle – Beth had expected it to be Daryl, but it was Carol who stepped into the room and closed the door behind her. Taken aback by Carol’s presence, Beth was unsure as to whether she just felt confused, or whether there was disappointment lingering inside her at the sight of the older woman’s face.

“Hi,” Carol said as she stepped further into the room, a gentle smile playing on her lips, her arms folded across her upper body as her light eyes danced around the room. It was almost as if she was taking it all in for the first time, too, but if she was trying to fool Beth, it wasn’t working – the blonde had a feeling from the fact that she entered uninvited that Carol was no stranger to the captain’s quarters. “It’s nice in here, huh?”

In her best attempt at acting nonchalant, Beth shrugged her shoulders loosely and tried to keep her facial expression neutral. “I guess,” she said, her own eyes exploring the large space once again, hovering over the desk once more.

Whilst Beth didn’t necessarily feel uncomfortable in the older woman’s presence – after all, so far Carol had only ever been nice to her – she didn’t feel completely at ease, either. Although she supposed that was a natural reaction considering the fact that she was being held on this ship against her will.

“You said that I’d be staying in my room,” Beth said as she continued to look over at the desk, unable to stop the words from falling from her tongue.

From her peripheral, Beth didn’t miss the way in which the smile on Carol’s face dropped at her words. “I know,” Carol said. “But there was a change of plan, and this is your room now.”

Sighing, Beth turned her head so that she was facing Carol once more, her hand moving without conscious thought so that her fingers explored the smooth wood at the foot of the bed. “No, it’s not,” she said, her voice low. “This is _his_ room.”

A smile crept onto Carol’s face again. “It’s yours, too, Beth. I know that you don’t like this situation right now –”

“I won’t _ever_ like it,” Beth interrupted, her eyes widening at the older woman.

Somewhat defeated, it was Carol’s turn to sigh. “Beth,” she said, her voice gentle and kind in a way that uncomfortably reminded her of her mother. “The captain – he’s a little… rough around the edges. But he’s a _good man_. And I’m sure that he doesn’t like this situation much more than you do.”

Scoffing, Beth felt anger begin to swirl and bubble in her stomach and push its way up through her chest. Had she seriously just said that the captain didn’t want this?

Was this woman crazy?

If it wasn’t for the captain and his brother – alright, and _her_ brother, too – then she wouldn’t be here in the first place; stuck on this ship in the middle of the damned ocean, where she may as well be one hundred million miles away from home, from her family.

“You can’t be serious right now,” Beth said, shaking her head once more. “You know as much as I do that he holds all the power here. If he didn’t want this, then I would’ve never been brought here.”

Pursing her lips, the older woman’s shoulders tensed. “You’ll understand eventually, Beth. There’s a lot more to this situation than you know right now –”

“Then tell me,” the blonde retorted, impatience evident in her tone as she turned her whole body around to face Carol. “If there’s more that you know about _my_ situation, then I have a right to know.”

“I said that there’s a lot more to the situation, not that _I_ knew anything more about it.”

Just as Beth opened her mouth to respond once more, the door creaked open once again, and both of the women looked towards it. This time, it was the captain who had entered; dressed all in black – black boots and black jeans, a black tee covered with a black jacket – and he looked almost surprised to see them both stood there.

Quickly recovering from their heated discussion, Carol smiled over at the younger woman. “Well, Beth,” she said, her tone chipper and almost sweet as she straightened out her body and allowed her arms to drop by her sides in a much more relaxed posture. “Think about what I said, okay? An’ I’ll see you soon.”

With that, Carol left Beth feeling more confused than she had done before, and she turned on her heel and swiftly made her way over towards the heavy wooden door. The grey-haired woman paused briefly to nod at the captain before she scooted around him to leave the room, closing the door behind her.

A little perplexed, Beth followed Carol with her eyes until she had left, and then she lingered on the door frame for a few beats of silence before she finally glanced over at the captain. He was stood in the centre of the room, looking anything but comfortable considering the fact that she was the one who didn’t belong in here, not him.

Straightening his shoulders so that he stood up taller, Daryl cleared his throat. “You made yourself at home?” he said, recovering from his brief few seconds of appearing almost uncertain. He strode over towards where Beth was stood, and her breath hitched in her throat when he got awfully close to her; however, he didn’t stay. Instead, he headed over towards his desk where he stripped his jacket from his shoulders and placed it on the bench there.

Inhaling deeply, Beth shook her head. “N-not quite,” she murmured, certain that he would be able to hear her even as she stuttered over her words. Beth didn't quite understand why she often felt so nervous around him, but she imagined it had a lot to do with the fact that he would have the power to get her thrown overboard if he wanted to. And as upset and angry and devastated she was to be in this position, she wasn't _quite_ ready for that. Still, even after his silent warning yesterday, she was unable to help herself from speaking up and challenging him once again. “Why have you brought me in here, _captain_? I was told that I’d be staying in _my_ room.”

“Tol’ you to call me Daryl,” he said, his tone steady and flat - as per usual, she noted. He seemed content with ignoring her question, and instead of answering her - or even appearing to consider her words - he busied himself by leaning down and beginning to untie his laces. His avoidance frustrated her, and she opened her mouth to speak once more, but this time no words came out as she turned her head towards him.

Despite the fact that this was the man that she had been promised to through Shawn's messed-up bet, the two of them hadn’t spent very much time together at all – which no doubt had something to do with the animosity that she displayed towards him, but in all fairness he had hardly acted all that interested in her, either. Their conversation yesterday had been the first time that they had really interacted with one another since the first day that she came onto the ship. 

And now this was the first time that Beth had seen him without his dark jacket on, and regardless of her annoyance, the blonde was unable to resist from appreciating the tanned, taut muscles of his arms. Despite herself, her gaze lingered on them for much longer than she would have liked it to.

Maybe after everything that had happened to her, she was losing her mind.

Or maybe she wasn’t growing used to the motion of the sea like she had thought – perhaps it had knocked her so sick that it had sent her delirious.

Either way, Daryl looked up whilst she continued to look over him; and his eyes locked with hers when she noticed that he had been staring back at her. Embarrassed about the fact that he had well and truly caught her checking him out, Beth’s own light blue eyes quickly darted away from him and instead she averted her gaze – not so casually – towards the ceiling.  
But there was absolutely no doubt in her mind that he knew _exactly_ where she had been looking.

From the corner of her eye, Beth noted a smirk playing on the corner of his lips, although it quickly disappeared. It hadn't taken Beth all that long to figure out that Daryl was not someone who liked to showcase his emotions all that often. Not like she did - Beth was your typical open book, although she was trying her hardest at the minute since she was in unfamiliar territory to not be so easy to read. 

Once he kicked off his boots, Daryl pushed himself upright so that he was now standing. Even from a distance, the height difference between them was noticeable, although Beth didn't feel intimated by him. Although he seemed like a pain in the ass, she supposed that Carol was semi-correct in that he _appeared_ to be a decent man. Beth had always prided herself on her ability to read a person, and she wasn't necessarily getting any particularly bad vibes from Daryl, even after everything that had happened over these last few days. 

Beth wondered what that really meant. 

Not hesitating for another beat more, Daryl strode over to where Beth was stood at the foot of the four-poster bed. He stopped in his motions when he was a good few feet away from her so that the pair of them could clearly look at each other without crooking their necks. The look on his face as he gazed at her was _intense_ , and Beth was sure that he might set her ablaze if he didn't stop immediately.

After another brief pause of silence, Daryl finally spoke; averting his gaze from her eyes so that he was now examining the rug beneath her feet. "Figured that there was no point in you stayin' in that little room when there's so much space in here," Daryl said, and it took Beth a second or two to realise that he was answering her question. "If you're gonna be with me -", he paused, their eyes locking once more as his chin shot up. He cleared his throat before continuing. "If you're gonna be with me, Beth, then you should be in here. You need t' be."

"I'm not going to sleep with you," the blonde blurted out before she could even think about what it was that she was saying, and despite the hardness of her tone, Beth's cheeks burned a deep shade of crimson all the same at the fact that she had actually just said that to him.

“Shit, girl,” he said, his voice low. “I ain’t gonna force you to – ”

Yesterday, Beth had felt somewhat reluctant to engage in a debate with the captain considering the fact that she felt as though he wasn't _that_ bad. But she didn't know this man - she didn't know him at all - and her conversation with Carol had already caused her to feel a bit riled up, so the use of _that_ word caused her to snap internally. "Don't," she hissed at him, not missing the shocked look in his eyes due to the fact that she had interrupted him. She imagined that he wasn't used to many people doing that. "You _are_ forcing me. You're making me be here right now. I don't want to be on this ship. I don't want to be in some sort of messed up relationship with you. I don't want to be in this room. I just want to go _home_." 

As she finished snapping at him, Daryl ran a hand through his unruly, dark hair; and it was clear to Beth from the way that he moved that he was beginning to grow agitated with her. _Good_ , she thought to herself. Yesterday, she hadn't wanted to irritate him; but after the whole fiasco of changing her room and after her conversation with Carol, her patience had worn thin. 

She wasn’t prepared to back down to him.

“I already told you that _this_ is your home now,” Daryl said, his voice akin to a growl in the way that it was yesterday. Warning her once more, but she wasn't phased by it - not tonight. 

“And I already told you that it’s not,” she retorted, crossing her arms over her chest in a way that he would probably view as being childish, but she didn't care. _That's_ what he got for forcing a seventeen year old to come and live with him on his ship, she thought to herself.

Shaking his head in frustration, Daryl stared intensely at Beth once more. “Y’know what?" he said, clearly close to breaking point. This was the first time that Beth had realised that the captain had a temper on him - and that he didn't need much encouragement to lose his cool with her. "Fine. You go ahead an’ be a bitch about it." She rolled her eyes at his terminology. "Fuck, be my guest an' sleep on the floor for all I care. I sure as hell ain't gonna stop you.”

It was the first time - well, the first two times - that Beth had heard him swear, although his crass words and biting tone didn't surprise her or intimidate her whatsoever. She was irritated beyond belief, and it wasn't as if she was taking everything out on him without fair reason - after all, he was the reason that she felt this way. Beth shrugged her shoulders indifferently, her tone flat and as cold as she could muster it to be. “Fine,” she said stubbornly. “I will.”

“Good,” he growled, strolling past her and heading towards the bathroom, and there was no doubt in Beth's mind that he had gone in there to get ready for bed and to change into his nightclothes. He slammed the bathroom door behind him, and Beth resisted from flinching at the sound, instead choosing to fume silently on the spot as she stared at the closed door. 

Part of her wondered if she had pushed him into an unnecessary argument, but another part of her felt as though he deserved an awful lot more of where that came from. Whether the captain liked it or not, she wasn't the type of girl who was going to make this easy for him - not considering how hard it was for her to go through this with no friends or family around her. Sure, Daryl Dixon might be an attractive man, but he was surly and gruff, and worse than Carol's 'rough around the edges' dismissal. It was clear to see that he had a temper, and Beth wasn't in any sort of mood to enter a relationship with a man she barely knew, but never mind one who acted like a toddler having a tantrum.

The sound of a shower running in the bathroom caused Beth to relax her shoulders as she registered the fact that Daryl was probably going to be a while, meaning that she hopefully had enough time to get herself settled and drift off to sleep before he finished up in the bathroom. Since she didn’t have anything in her possession to change into for bed, and now that she couldn’t sleep comfortably in her underwear since she wasn’t in the privacy of her own room, Beth figured that she may as well get herself settled on the floor. She was tempted to sleep next to the door, where she could be as far away from him as possible, but the thought of someone entering unknowingly and whacking the door into her wasn't a risk that she was willing to take. 

Feeling as though where she was stood was as good a spot as anywhere, Beth settled herself down onto the soft rug at the foot of the bed. As the young blonde curled into the fetal position on her left side, she began to feel nauseous; unable to hide from the way in which the floor rocked up and down with the motion of the waves now that she was lay on it. Nonetheless, she was adamant that she wasn’t going to move – after all, she couldn’t think of anything worse than sharing a bed with Daryl Dixon, even if it meant that she had to throw up a few times during the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So.. what do you think?!
> 
> I apologise in advance if this story seems sort of... jumpy, or whatever. I've never written in this style before so I'm not sure whether it's working very well or not. But since Beth has a lot of unanswered questions, and I'll be writing this story from her POV, I want you as the reader to have unanswered questions too, you know? I hope you know. Otherwise I don't. Lol.


	4. the darkness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl attempts to make progress with Beth.

No matter how hard she tries - _if_ she ever tries – Beth knows that she will never forget the moment that she was forced away from her family.

The day began like any other normal day. That is, as normal as a day could be when you were living in the new apocalypse; when you no longer attended classes because half of your school was dead, the other half hiding away. The television in the Greene home no longer worked – just like every other television, as far as she was aware – but it wasn’t something that really impacted on her quality of life since Beth had never been much of a lover of the small screen, anyway. If anything, it’s absence meant that the blonde had more of an opportunity to spend her free time reading her books, rather than be distracted by anything else.

So, that’s what she had been doing that morning until the scent of eggs being cooked met her nostrils. She made her way quickly down the staircase and was unable to fight the small smile that ghosted her lips as she entered the kitchen. Inhaling deeply, her smile grew wider when she saw her sister stood by the stove. “They smell good, Mags,” Beth breathed out as the older of the two girls turned her head over her shoulder, flashing her younger sibling a similarly bright smile.

“Sit down,” Maggie said, bobbing her head towards the kitchen table. “They’re almost ready.”

Now, Beth cannot help but wonder whether Maggie knew of what was going to happen to her just a few hours later. After all, although it wasn’t a rare occurrence for Maggie to be getting on with jobs – the brunette always did get on with her fair share of jobs around the farm – it _was_ unlike Maggie to cook breakfast for everyone.

She doesn’t allow herself to think on about that too much. After all, regardless of whether her sister knew about her brother’s deal and the nightmare that had occurred as a result of it, it won’t ever change anything.

It was later, when Beth was progressing with her chores – which included feeding the chickens, collecting the freshly laid eggs and de-cluttering some of the mess from the stables – when Beth heard the distinct sound of a gun being fired somewhere in the distance. She flinched at the sound and immediately halted in her movements, a sickly feeling brewing in her stomach.

There was no way that the gun had been fired somewhere in the distance – not when it was so loud that the sound pierced her ears. The Greene family possessed land that stretched on for acres and acres – their closest neighbours weren’t exactly _close_ \- so she knew that there was no way that it could have come from anywhere but, well, here.

Growing more concerned by the second – after all, the sound of silence that echoed around the farm after the shot was fired was anything but reassuring – Beth quickly made her way outside, looking on at the farmhouse with a startled expression on her face. With her heart pounding violently in her chest, the blonde couldn’t wait a minute longer to see what was going on, and so she set off towards the house in order to get a better understanding about what on earth was happening.

And boy, did she regret doing that now. She wonders what would have happened if she had ignored the sound, if she had stayed put in the stables and pretended that she hadn’t heard anything. If Maggie hadn’t known what was to come, then perhaps Shawn would have offered her instead; after all, it wasn’t as if Merle would have known that she was there if she had never made herself present in the sitting room.

Regardless, Beth knows in her heart that it’s pointless thinking about now. There isn’t a doubt in her mind that she was suggested to Merle by Shawn for a reason. She was small and weak and _young_ , not like her older sister who was loud and defiant and, of course, a good few years older than her. Nobody would have ever taken Maggie against her will – not only would she not have let them, but Beth honestly thinks that they wouldn’t want to.

She wasn’t an easy target. Not like her younger sister.

Despite the resentment that has settled in her heart towards both of the Dixon brother’s over – well, _everything_ \- she realistically knows that they aren’t the only ones to blame in this whole mess that is her current situation.

By the time that she walked into the sitting room, the deal had already been made; the decision already finalised, whether she liked it or not. It had been decided that Beth was going to be leaving with Merle _immediately_ , and she had strict instructions from Shawn to go and gather her essential belongings quickly.

Her daddy looked on from the corner of the sitting room, a horrified look upon his face; although he didn’t speak up, didn’t say anything at all, not even when she cried and begged and screamed. Merle had to practically drag her down the porch steps of the farmhouse as she howled, and whilst Maggie had silently cried and Shawn had apologised time after time after time – “I’ll come back for you, I promise,” she recalls him saying – her father had remained silent.

Perhaps that’s what hurt most of all.

.

.

.

The sound of thunder crashing overhead causes Beth to jump awake from her dreamless slumber; her light blue eyes struggling to make sense of anything in the pure darkness of the unfamiliar, large room. Rubbing her eyes with the back of her hands, the blonde allows herself a few more seconds to adjust to the lack of light in the room before she begins to gather her bearings.

Of course, she was still in the captain’s quarters; and although she supposed that they were now technically _her_ quarters, too, Beth didn’t feel as though ‘The Captain  & Beth’s Quarters’ had quite the same ring to it, and so she couldn’t see many of the crew referring to it as such. Besides, a large part of her still didn’t _want_ them too, either. Although she knew that this whole situation wasn’t completely Daryl’s fault – although a big part of it was, considering it was _him_ she had been bound to – it was impossible to not feel bitter towards the captain.

Yawning and making the decision not to think on that for too much longer, the blonde pushed herself upwards so that she was sat up straight and pressed the small of her back against the headboard of the bed, settling herself so that she was more comfortable. The last few nights on board had evoked plenty of sleepless nights and also included an awful lot of tossing and turning, however, she couldn’t fault how comfortable this mattress was; she hadn’t woken up once, and judging by how dark it was, it was easily the very early hours of the morning, if not approaching dawn.

A small smile sat on her face whilst she stretched her arms above her head, making a mewling sound as she did so. And then, as she blinked her eyes open and took in her surroundings once more, Beth’s lips slowly descended into a frown as she very quickly realised that she had not fallen asleep in bed.

As the understanding dawns upon her that Daryl must have been responsible for picking her up and placing her into bed, a quick huff escapes her flared nostrils as she fires her head around to the left so that she’s looking directly at his sleeping form. In the darkness of the room, it’s difficult for her to make out his distinctive features – his shaggy dark hair and his stubbled cheeks – but Beth can just about make out his outline. Lay on his back with his arm thrown lazily across his eyes, he’s obviously still very much asleep.

Despite herself, Beth longs to see his expression whilst sleeping. She can imagine how much different he must look whilst at peace in his dreams – all that she has seen of him so far is serious expressions, knotted brows and thinly-pressed lips.

The captain’s behaviour both confuses her and excites her in ways that she would have never imagined to be possible. Her emotions towards him are confusing, to say the least, and as she continues to watch his sleeping form in the dark, she wonders to herself what will come of their being together. It hasn’t been discussed whatsoever; although she supposes that she hasn’t _really_ given him much of an opportunity to talk to her about it, and despite knowing that she hasn’t done anything wrong, there’s a part of Beth that still feels guilty in a way that she doesn’t comprehend.

She decides in that moment that her brain is absolutely fucked, although she equally doesn’t blame it. So much has happened in the last few weeks alone, never mind the last few days, and she isn’t sure just how anyone would cope with everything that she has been through, never mind a seventeen year old girl.

In the past, Beth has been excruciatingly hard on herself – most of the time, for things that seem almost trivial now. Her thin fingers ghost across the scar on her left wrist at the memory of some of them; but now, she feels as though she has finally come to terms with the fact that cannot control every single thing that happens to her, and that the best that she can do it manage the feelings that she already has rather than attempting to repress them, or wish them away.

Still. It isn’t easy.

Beside her, Daryl stirs, rolling over onto his side so that he is facing her. The movement of his body causes her to immediately disregard her thoughts, and Beth’s heart is practically in her mouth as she realises that he’s awake.

“Hey,” he near enough whispers, his voice low as ever, but soft in a way that she hasn’t heard from him before. It’s foreign to her, this tone that he has, and she doesn’t even have time right now to wonder over whether it’s because he’s being kind to her or whether it’s simply because he’s just woken up and this is how he always sounds in that circumstance.

Either way, Beth’s heart pounds even harder at the sound of him speaking, and she’s certain that it’s not beating faster because she’s scared. Still, the blonde feels as though she’s forgotten how to speak – after all, it’s not like she was expecting him to wake up so suddenly – and she is quiet for a few beats before she releases a long breath that she didn’t even realise she had been holding.

Wanting to respond but feeling stupid and weird since she _had_ been watching him sleep – well, as much as she could, anyway, given the darkness of the room – Beth’s mouth gapes open. “I know tha’ you’re awake, girl,” Daryl continues, his voice still soft and it sounds as though there is something akin to _teasing_ in his tone.

This baffles her even more, and Beth continues to stare blankly at him, relieved about the darkness so that she can be safe in the knowledge he cannot see how embarrassing she looks.

A few more silent seconds pass between them, and Daryl lets outs a small, tired sigh before he pushes himself upright from where he has been lay in the bed. It’s not as if they are overly close to one another – after all, the four poster bed really is huge – but Beth swears that she can feel his body heat from where she is perched. He doesn’t stay still for long, though, and within a few more seconds he pushes the covers from himself and swings his legs over the side of the bed so that she’s now facing his back.

“You should really try an’ go back to sleep,” the older man says, and Beth cocks her head to the side as she continues to try and watch the outline of him in the darkness of the room as he pushes himself up into a standing position. “Got a big day t’day.”

That catches her interest, and Beth frowns in confusion.

“I do?” she says, absolutely no hesitation or tiredness audible in her voice, and she hears him chuckle – actually _chuckle_ \- and her frown deepens.

She watches as he shakes his head gently, and it looks as though he’s buttoning up his shirt as he moves around the bed and walks towards the centre of the room. As he disappears into the darkness, his voice sounds quieter than it did before. “Should’a known that’d get your attention,” he says, and although she cannot see his face, Beth swears that she can hear him smiling.

Now _that_ would be a sight to see.

“Think it’s about time you had a tour o’ the ship an’ formally met the crew, don’t you?” he asks her, and Beth blinks into the dark as she hears him walk towards the door.

And yet despite the early hour and the fact that he’s being so – well, _gentle_ with her – she cannot forget their heated discussion last night, or the events of the last few days. Anger doesn’t burn in her belly with the same fire that it has done before, but it still lies there, unsettled, and despite his efforts she cannot hold her tongue. “I think it’s about time you answered some of my questions, too,” she responds, grateful once more for the darkness.

The sound of the door opens with a creak, and Beth expects him to say nothing, but instead he speaks up. “Yeah,” he says, and her eyes practically double in size at his agreement. “Prob’ly is.” There’s silence for a few seconds more, and then he speaks again. “So try an’ get some more sleep. I told you, s’gonna be a big day.”

And with those words, he’s gone, and Beth is left alone in the captain’s quarters, equally as confused as she was when she first woke up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all SO much for all of the comments that you have left so far on my little story! I haven't had chance to respond individually to you all as of yet but I promise I'll try! You guys are the best x


End file.
